Carnival of the Elitist Bastards XV: Storm the Beaches!

COTEB XV be up at the Coffee-Stained Writer. Captain NP threw us a beach party worthy o' the name o' Elitist Bastard!

So rather than hopping from port to port, we'll be hopping from lounger to lounger, towel to towel, taking in the relaxed, rum-drunk rhetoric of our crew, giving them a bit of a break before they take back to the choppy waters that will be sure to meet them next month.

Aye, I feel refreshed already! Grab yer cocktail and join us on the beach for a bit o' well-deserved R&R. Huzzah!

Last Chance to Get Yer Treasure Aboard

NP be takin' all the Elitist Bastards she can muster aboard. Ye don't want to miss a nice trip to the beach, now, do ye? Get yer best elitist bastardry submitted to elitistbastardscarnival@gmail.com by end o' day Friday so ye're assured plenty o' sand, sun and rum.

Besides, ye don't want to miss yer chance to sunbathe with a celebrity, do ye? That's right - we have a new sailor this time out, and he be famous among skeptics. Ye'll be tellin' yer grandchildren about the time ye sailed alongside o' the illustrious Pirate X - but only if ye get aboard the ship on time.

Git Yer Bums on t' Beach!

NP be docking the HMS Elitist Bastard and takin' the crew out for a little R n R on the beach. Ye know ye'll want t' be a part o' that! All ye have to do in order to enjoy a wee bit o' sun and fun is get yer submission in to elitistbastardscarnival@gmail.com by the end o' day Friday, July 24th.

For those o' ye who've never yet sailed wi' us, 'tis simplicity itself. Here be the simple requirements:

1. Pick a blog post o' yours that hits the stupid where it hurts.

2. Send us the link.

That be it.

For some Elitist Bastard inspiration, ye can peruse Roger Ebert's fine demonstration here. He be one o' us, as Captain Blake mentioned to me.

Which brings me to our next subject: if ye're raidin' the blogosphere and come across a fine bit o' elitist bastardry, ye can send us the link for press gangin' purposes. As long as it's in by Monday, I can wrestle the unsuspecting soul aboard.

We also be runnin' low on Captains, so if ye want to helm the ship, send me word.

That be it. I expect an inbox flooded with Elitist Bastardry come the deadline. Don't miss the beach party the way ye missed Captain John's birthday party.