NP be takin' all the Elitist Bastards she can muster aboard. Ye don't want to miss a nice trip to the beach, now, do ye? Get yer best elitist bastardry submitted to elitistbastardscarnival@gmail.com by end o' day Friday so ye're assured plenty o' sand, sun and rum.
Besides, ye don't want to miss yer chance to sunbathe with a celebrity, do ye? That's right - we have a new sailor this time out, and he be famous among skeptics. Ye'll be tellin' yer grandchildren about the time ye sailed alongside o' the illustrious Pirate X - but only if ye get aboard the ship on time.
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