Did ye think we'd never get away from the dock? Hah! The Elitist Bastard is cutting water and breaking ice. And woe betide any con ships that cross her path this month! Get the top-secret skinny on her mission at Decrepit Old Fool: Carnival Of The Elitist Bastards, the "it's for research" edition.
It's readily apparent I'm no sea-dog, but luckily the crew is fully seasoned!